Friday, July 01, 2005

Getting a child to pray, praying loud for women

Question: I have a 13 year old son who has been praying for a few months now, I made him to start praying,Now he is telling me that the reason he is praying mostly is because of me, he is afraid I will yell at him, he said that he cant make himself feel that he is praying for Allah. Most of the time I am always nagging him to get up and pray before the prayer time is over. And he prayers really fast and doesnt care about any of his movements if they are right or wrong. I think it may be normal for him at this age to be acting this way,I dont know, I really and truly want him to pray because Allah ordered us to worship him. Shall I leave him to keep praying the way he is or is it better that he stops praying until he learns more? I dont know what to do, His father doesnt pray and there is noone but me to try and guide him the right way. I'm afraid that by me forcing him to pray that he will hate hate prayer and stop it altogether as soon as he is older. And I'm also afraid because I'm obligated to make my children pray at the age of puberty.

Answer: What you are doing is excactly what you must do, and you should make sure that he prays correctly. Actually, it was a duty for you to start this when he turned seven. Do not worry about forcing, because the Prophet ordered us (i.e. it is an obligation) to hit our children for leaving prayer when they are beyond 10 years of age. Be wise, however, and use the mildest effective ways to make him pray. Try to involve your son in lessons on belief and other religious issues to help him understand the importance of what he is doing. He should learn to be proud that he is a muslim and that he prays, and thank Allah for this invaluable gift.

Question: Are women allowed to pray out loud? I pray my night prayers out loud sometimes, I find that it helps me concentrate on the prayer more and I rememeber what ayat I have read when I pray out loud (( Dont get me wrong ,not in a high voice, but just much as I can hear myself properly. Am I allowed to pray the day prayers out loud also if it helps me concentrate?

Answer: There is no problem in doing this for Maghrib, Esha and Fajr. You may also raise your voice in other prayers made at night. The only restriction would be fear of fitna because of men hearing your voice.

... and Allah knows best.